Wedding Attending Feeling

Once again, the wedding attending season is upon us and I have attended my first for this year last night. It inspired few thoughts within me and I would like to share them with nobody in mind in particular (and they are all not related to the wedding that I attended last night, so I am not in any way shape or form badmouthing it).

1) I find that nowadays I look forward the most in a wedding is the food. It probably due to the fact that I have already attended my fair share of wedding and they are more or less the same. I am not complaining that they are boring or un-inspiring, I guess everyone is looking for the same thing in their wedding that’s why the end product looks pretty much on the same track. Food, however, is a different story. First of all, there are different styles/ethnicity. Secondly, there are different menus. Thirdly, there are different restaurants/banquet halls. Let’s just said that most of the time you never know what you get until it is on the table.

2) I think a lot of people have this believe that wedding banquet is the best place to look at and meet girls that they don’t know before. I am not sure if I buy in to this believe completely. Looking back at all the banquets that I went, I don’t recall more than 5 people that I would consider “good looking”. Of course there is a chance that all the people that know the people that I know are not the most good looking people to start with, but I believe the chance of that happen is quite small to count this as a real factor. And even if you see someone that knock you off your feet, so what, there is probably someone stand right beside her that can knock you off your feet, break both of your leg, and tie your arms in a knot in record breaking time too. What I really finds worth looking for in a wedding or the banquet afterward are…… DRESSES. I can usually find at least a couple of beautiful dresses. Dresses that not only look good by itself but also make whoever wearing them like a star. One advice to all the girls out there, one complementing dress will make a guy go crazy just as much as not wearing anything at all (assuming you have a knock out body that is, if not, stick to those damn dresses).

3) POWER POINT PRESENTATION really should not be force feeds down your throat. I am not the most sentimental person on this whole wide world so maybe my feeling is not legit, but I really find most PPR boring and repetitive, especially when the married couple are around the same age as me. Trust me, if you cover up the bride and the gloom, I swear that all the pictures from all the weddings that I have ever attended are from the same album. So please show it at times like I am eating or waiting for my turn to take a picture with the newlywed, no like in the middle of the ceremony so I am forced to watch it, have a heart, would you? While I am at it, try to make it into one single file instead of after showing 5 pictures, we get to have extra bonus footage of “How to move the mouse in Window™ environment” or “How to load a slide show with Microsoft™ PowerPoint Presentation™”. The educational value is so great that my heart will not be able to take it.

I think I have insult enough people today, although most of them consist of people that THINK I have insulted them. Misunderstanding is just so ugly.

Marriage is such a beautiful thing, so keep it coming!!


Chill

Sometimes they stick

I was working hard and fast (would you actually believe that) on last Friday when suddenly Nature calls. Not wanted to make a scene, and being a hygienic Canadian Citizen myself, I quickly and silently went to my preferred stall and that is when I saw it – a stain on the toilet bowl.

The first moment that I laid my eyes on that stain, it shocked me so much that I could barely stand. The reason? It looks exactly like the stain I left behind at the exactly toilet on Wednesday. I know that this may contradict my usually hygienic Canadian Citizen image, but sometimes they do stick and there is nothing you can do about it without any equipment.
Dazed by the revelation, and urged by the Nature, I sat down to think about the whole situation while letting my unconscious mind took care of the business. While I was recovering from the whole scene something bugged me at the same time. Suddenly my mind recognize what was the cause of the discomfort, my lower part of my body (ok, ok, my butt) was trying desperately to tell me that THE SEAT IS DISGUSTINGLY WARM.

O MY GEORGE, I cannot tell you how disgusted I felt right at that moment. I understand that some of you might never feel what I felt cause you don’t “sit”, you “hover”. I always don’t understand how some people can “hover” for like 15 minutes plus without getting leg cram and fall straight into the “nutty chocolate abyss”. Maybe they “hover” like an alien mothership? They sort of standby with a semi-stand position and when it is go time, they “hover” down and instead of beam-up a helpless cow or some unfortunate bystander, they “beam-down” something hot and steamy and then go back up to the standby mode again until they are all done?

Anyway, after I quickly finish in record breaking time, I evaluate the whole situation and come up with some vital points?

1) Is it actually the same stain? Stain do look-a-like each other something.
2) Is it possible that (assuming it is the same stain) the stain last from Wednesday to Friday without disfigure, discolour or disgusting enough so that whoever clean the toilet will clean it?
3) Do someone actually clean the toilet of my workplace?
4) Even if no one cleans it, won’t the numerous flushing sort of clean it?
5) Can a human being produce something that can produce a stain that is immune to flushing?
6) May I special enough to produce any flush proof item?
7) If I am that special, can I be an X-man?
8) I wonder if Rouge™ will go out with me?
9) What happen if Gambit™ try to kill me?

I am getting all excited and stuff so when I went home I shared my founding and discovering, my worry and my concern to my “hovering” half. She, however, didn’t seems to be moved by my whole ordeal at all. WOW, I tell you, she is like ROCK SOLID, maybe she is an X-man already?

Best not to piss her off too much



Chill